1 00:00:03,028 --> 00:00:06,171 [theme music] 2 00:01:48,049 --> 00:01:49,257 RADIO: Good morning Los Angeles. 3 00:01:49,335 --> 00:01:50,976 And what a beautiful one it is too, right 4 00:01:51,052 --> 00:01:52,402 here in the City of the Angels. 5 00:01:52,479 --> 00:01:55,147 This is Jack Michaelson. 6 00:01:55,223 --> 00:01:56,439 What are you doing? 7 00:01:56,516 --> 00:01:57,932 I thought you wanted to hear some music? 8 00:01:58,010 --> 00:02:00,652 Yeah, but he's talking about the City of the Angels. 9 00:02:00,729 --> 00:02:02,904 Don't you want to support the home team? 10 00:02:02,981 --> 00:02:05,157 Besides this guy Jack Michaelson, he's OK. 11 00:02:05,233 --> 00:02:06,649 Really. 12 00:02:06,727 --> 00:02:08,201 Yeah, he did a show about cops once and all the junk 13 00:02:08,278 --> 00:02:09,202 they have to put up with. 14 00:02:09,279 --> 00:02:10,453 I mean, the guy is great. 15 00:02:10,530 --> 00:02:12,297 He really knows what he's talking about. 16 00:02:12,374 --> 00:02:13,957 Put it back on. 17 00:02:13,968 --> 00:02:15,508 There you go. 18 00:02:15,586 --> 00:02:16,835 RADIO: And we're here today with Mary Ann McKenna 19 00:02:16,912 --> 00:02:18,712 talking about the exploitation of women 20 00:02:18,788 --> 00:02:22,299 in general and beauty pageant contestants in particular. 21 00:02:22,375 --> 00:02:24,217 Boy is this guy full of it. 22 00:02:24,294 --> 00:02:25,302 Well, you just said-- 23 00:02:25,378 --> 00:02:26,595 I know what I just said. 24 00:02:26,671 --> 00:02:28,638 When he talks about cops he's OK. 25 00:02:28,715 --> 00:02:31,266 When he talks about women's lib he is full of it. 26 00:02:31,343 --> 00:02:32,434 - Oh, you think so? - Yes. 27 00:02:32,510 --> 00:02:33,393 I don't have to think so. 28 00:02:33,470 --> 00:02:34,962 I know so. 29 00:02:35,038 --> 00:02:37,564 Nobody on the face of this earth has it as easy as women, 30 00:02:37,575 --> 00:02:39,024 especially good looking ones. 31 00:02:39,100 --> 00:02:40,951 Oh Mark, come on. 32 00:02:41,028 --> 00:02:42,736 Don't come on me. 33 00:02:42,812 --> 00:02:44,321 I mean, what is that old saying? 34 00:02:44,397 --> 00:02:46,573 Diamonds are a girl's best friend. 35 00:02:46,650 --> 00:02:48,074 And what does a man get, huh? 36 00:02:48,151 --> 00:02:49,034 What does he get? 37 00:02:49,110 --> 00:02:50,252 A dog. 38 00:02:50,329 --> 00:02:51,979 Yeah well, there's another old saying, 39 00:02:52,055 --> 00:02:54,464 don't judge a person until you walk a mile in their moccasins. 40 00:02:54,541 --> 00:02:56,216 They don't wear moccasins. 41 00:02:56,293 --> 00:02:58,251 Men wear moccasins. 42 00:02:58,328 --> 00:03:02,130 They wear Gucci's, or Pucci's or Gucci's. 43 00:03:02,207 --> 00:03:03,048 Hey, I didn't make it up. 44 00:03:03,124 --> 00:03:04,049 Ask anybody. 45 00:03:04,059 --> 00:03:05,725 Ask the boss. 46 00:03:05,803 --> 00:03:08,261 If it wasn't for Eve we'd still all be in a garden somewhere 47 00:03:08,272 --> 00:03:10,472 having to fix the grapes. 48 00:03:10,482 --> 00:03:13,442 Hey, Mark. 49 00:03:13,518 --> 00:03:14,401 MARK GORDON: What? 50 00:03:14,478 --> 00:03:15,977 You just ran a red light. 51 00:03:15,988 --> 00:03:16,937 Oh, come on. 52 00:03:17,013 --> 00:03:18,104 It was yellow. 53 00:03:18,181 --> 00:03:19,439 Well, I think it was red. 54 00:03:19,516 --> 00:03:21,158 So does the cop behind us. 55 00:03:21,235 --> 00:03:24,036 [police siren] 56 00:03:27,357 --> 00:03:28,457 Oh no. 57 00:03:40,045 --> 00:03:43,213 Sure glad I keep my badge and my wallet here. 58 00:03:43,290 --> 00:03:46,299 Watch me handle this. 59 00:03:46,376 --> 00:03:47,259 Hey, pal. 60 00:03:47,335 --> 00:03:48,651 I used to be a cop myself. 61 00:03:48,728 --> 00:03:50,762 I didn't mean to run that light but my friend 62 00:03:50,839 --> 00:03:53,390 and I were arguing about all this women's lib garbage, 63 00:03:53,466 --> 00:03:55,809 you know. 64 00:03:55,885 --> 00:03:56,893 Is that so. 65 00:03:59,889 --> 00:04:00,772 Cute, Jonathan. 66 00:04:00,849 --> 00:04:02,148 Cute. 67 00:04:02,225 --> 00:04:05,369 [music playing] 68 00:04:15,655 --> 00:04:17,831 Worldwide Pictures, what are we doing here? 69 00:04:17,907 --> 00:04:19,115 I don't know. 70 00:04:19,193 --> 00:04:21,668 All I know is this is where the assignment is. 71 00:04:21,745 --> 00:04:22,344 Hi. 72 00:04:22,421 --> 00:04:23,494 What can I do for you? 73 00:04:23,572 --> 00:04:25,222 Jonathan Smith and Mark Gordon. 74 00:04:25,299 --> 00:04:26,381 Smith and Gordon. 75 00:04:26,458 --> 00:04:27,340 Let's see. 76 00:04:27,417 --> 00:04:28,741 OK. 77 00:04:28,819 --> 00:04:29,826 Park your car in any unmarked spot 78 00:04:29,903 --> 00:04:31,319 and then head up to security. 79 00:04:31,396 --> 00:04:32,846 Sam Quigley will give you a lot passes. 80 00:04:32,922 --> 00:04:35,348 Sam Quigley, he didn't used to be a cop in Oakland did he? 81 00:04:35,425 --> 00:04:36,725 Yeah, he used to be an Oakland cop. 82 00:04:36,801 --> 00:04:38,101 He's head of security here now. 83 00:04:38,178 --> 00:04:38,986 Well, I'll be. 84 00:04:39,062 --> 00:04:39,945 Hey, thanks a lot. 85 00:04:40,022 --> 00:04:40,862 You bet. 86 00:04:43,558 --> 00:04:44,432 Wait till you meet Sam. 87 00:04:44,510 --> 00:04:45,358 You're going to love him. 88 00:04:45,435 --> 00:04:46,760 I mean, he's a great guy. 89 00:04:46,837 --> 00:04:47,995 He's a real man's man, you know what I mean. 90 00:04:48,071 --> 00:04:49,571 How long has it been since you seen him? 91 00:04:49,647 --> 00:04:50,697 Oh, I don't know. 92 00:04:50,541 --> 00:04:52,666 10, 15 years. 93 00:04:52,743 --> 00:04:54,868 He's not in any trouble is he? 94 00:04:54,944 --> 00:04:56,369 He's not our assignment is he? 95 00:04:56,446 --> 00:04:59,873 Well, he's part of it. 96 00:04:59,949 --> 00:05:01,583 Gentlemen, you can go in now. 97 00:05:01,659 --> 00:05:02,718 Thank you very much. 98 00:05:05,455 --> 00:05:06,555 Hey, Sam. 99 00:05:06,631 --> 00:05:07,839 Hey. Hey, Gord-o. 100 00:05:07,916 --> 00:05:09,382 How are you buddy? Hey, hey. 101 00:05:09,459 --> 00:05:10,850 Oh, man it's good to see you. 102 00:05:10,928 --> 00:05:12,144 - It's good to see you, too. - You look great. 103 00:05:12,220 --> 00:05:13,303 - Oh, yeah. - Oh, Sam. 104 00:05:13,314 --> 00:05:14,471 This is my friend, Jonathan Smith. 105 00:05:14,547 --> 00:05:15,738 Hey, how you doing? 106 00:05:15,815 --> 00:05:16,873 Fine, it's a pleasure, you know. 107 00:05:16,950 --> 00:05:17,749 Yeah. Come on, sit down you guys. 108 00:05:17,826 --> 00:05:18,358 You wanna sit down? 109 00:05:18,435 --> 00:05:20,134 Go ahead. 110 00:05:20,211 --> 00:05:23,897 So, so you two are going to be working for Linda Blackwell, 111 00:05:23,973 --> 00:05:24,856 huh? 112 00:05:24,933 --> 00:05:26,232 Linda Blackwell, the movie star? 113 00:05:26,309 --> 00:05:27,825 Yeah. Yeah, that's right. 114 00:05:27,903 --> 00:05:29,069 Well you couldn't be working for a better person. 115 00:05:29,145 --> 00:05:30,144 She's a hell of a lady. 116 00:05:30,221 --> 00:05:30,904 I'll tell you. 117 00:05:30,980 --> 00:05:32,163 She is that. 118 00:05:32,241 --> 00:05:33,573 We've done all right for yourself, Sam. 119 00:05:33,650 --> 00:05:35,742 Head of security for a big studio. 120 00:05:35,819 --> 00:05:37,577 You check out all the new employees yourself? 121 00:05:37,654 --> 00:05:40,705 No, no just anyone who works for Miss Blackwell. 122 00:05:40,782 --> 00:05:43,500 I, I feel kind of protective of her, that's all. 123 00:05:43,576 --> 00:05:45,627 And with you guys set up to be her new bodyguard 124 00:05:45,703 --> 00:05:48,922 and hairdresser, well I, just didn't make any sense 125 00:05:48,998 --> 00:05:49,890 when I looked at your resumes. 126 00:05:49,966 --> 00:05:52,217 It, uh, it looked kind of fishy. 127 00:05:52,293 --> 00:05:54,219 Oh well, if you mean Jonathan, I can vouch for him. 128 00:05:54,295 --> 00:05:55,387 No, no. 129 00:05:55,463 --> 00:05:56,471 Smith checked out just fine. 130 00:05:56,548 --> 00:05:58,598 But what I couldn't figure out is 131 00:05:58,675 --> 00:06:01,434 what is a former Oakland cop doing applying 132 00:06:01,511 --> 00:06:04,104 for a job as a hairdresser. 133 00:06:04,180 --> 00:06:05,939 A hairdresser? 134 00:06:06,015 --> 00:06:07,131 Me? 135 00:06:07,209 --> 00:06:08,149 But then I figured, you know, I 136 00:06:08,226 --> 00:06:09,776 haven't seen old Gord-o here for 10 or 15 137 00:06:09,853 --> 00:06:11,611 years and people do change. 138 00:06:11,688 --> 00:06:14,239 And then your records from your beauty college 139 00:06:14,315 --> 00:06:16,157 checked out just fine. 140 00:06:16,234 --> 00:06:18,910 From my beauty college? 141 00:06:18,987 --> 00:06:20,745 SAM QUIGLEY: Yeah, right. 142 00:06:20,756 --> 00:06:24,624 Well, you two, why don't you head over the stage 21. 143 00:06:24,701 --> 00:06:26,376 Miss Blackwell's dressing room is right there. 144 00:06:26,453 --> 00:06:29,587 And well, here's your ID and just keep 145 00:06:29,664 --> 00:06:30,630 it with you at all times, OK. 146 00:06:30,707 --> 00:06:32,332 All right, thanks. 147 00:06:32,408 --> 00:06:33,466 Why don't we get together tonight and shoot some pool, 148 00:06:33,543 --> 00:06:34,801 drink some beer like the old days? 149 00:06:34,878 --> 00:06:36,719 Sure, you still like to do that, huh? 150 00:06:36,796 --> 00:06:37,720 Well sure, why wouldn't I? 151 00:06:37,797 --> 00:06:39,372 Well, I don't know. 152 00:06:39,449 --> 00:06:40,390 You used to be a cop, now you're a hairdresser. 153 00:06:40,467 --> 00:06:41,599 I just-- 154 00:06:41,676 --> 00:06:43,101 Hey, what's that supposed to mean? 155 00:06:43,178 --> 00:06:44,302 I was just kidding, Gord-o, hey. 156 00:06:44,113 --> 00:06:45,478 All right, we'll see you later. 157 00:06:45,555 --> 00:06:46,821 - All right, see you. - Take care. 158 00:06:46,698 --> 00:06:48,064 Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you. 159 00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:48,990 Good bye. 160 00:06:57,192 --> 00:06:58,041 Jonathan. 161 00:07:00,570 --> 00:07:02,162 Jonathan, wait a minute. 162 00:07:02,238 --> 00:07:03,738 This is crazy. 163 00:07:03,382 --> 00:07:04,497 I don't know anything about hairdressing. 164 00:07:04,574 --> 00:07:06,366 Well, you must. 165 00:07:06,442 --> 00:07:07,292 How else could you have graduated from beauty college? 166 00:07:07,302 --> 00:07:08,443 Look, I'm serious. 167 00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:10,253 So am I. Now, the boss wouldn't 168 00:07:10,330 --> 00:07:11,838 give you this assignment if he didn't think 169 00:07:11,915 --> 00:07:13,298 you could handle it. 170 00:07:13,374 --> 00:07:14,716 Now, here. 171 00:07:14,726 --> 00:07:16,076 What's this? 172 00:07:16,152 --> 00:07:17,927 It's your hairdressing bag. 173 00:07:18,004 --> 00:07:19,512 Come on. 174 00:07:19,589 --> 00:07:21,205 Oh, great. 175 00:07:20,983 --> 00:07:23,349 I haven't been a hairdresser for five minutes already 176 00:07:23,426 --> 00:07:24,276 and I'm carrying a purse. 177 00:07:34,437 --> 00:07:35,862 Hi, babe. 178 00:07:35,873 --> 00:07:36,779 How are you doing? 179 00:07:36,856 --> 00:07:38,823 Oh, just fine, Todd. 180 00:07:38,900 --> 00:07:41,117 Listen we got that, that big love scene this morning. 181 00:07:41,194 --> 00:07:43,661 Thought you might want to go over it, you know. 182 00:07:43,738 --> 00:07:44,537 Yeah, yeah. 183 00:07:44,614 --> 00:07:45,497 I know. 184 00:07:45,573 --> 00:07:46,748 I know my lines. 185 00:07:46,824 --> 00:07:50,043 I wasn't talking about lines. 186 00:07:50,119 --> 00:07:54,297 Yeah well, why don't we just save it for the camera, huh? 187 00:07:54,374 --> 00:07:57,509 Well, I can't play a scene, you know, without, 188 00:07:57,585 --> 00:07:58,885 without feeling the part. 189 00:07:58,962 --> 00:08:00,520 Right the parts, not my parts. 190 00:08:00,597 --> 00:08:02,138 Just let go, Todd. 191 00:08:02,149 --> 00:08:06,267 I can't play a scene without some feeling, you know. 192 00:08:06,278 --> 00:08:08,161 Well, I'll tell you what, when we get out 193 00:08:08,237 --> 00:08:10,063 there why don't you just close your eyes and pretend 194 00:08:10,139 --> 00:08:10,989 I'm your wife. 195 00:08:13,935 --> 00:08:18,321 Look, we're both mature adults, you know. 196 00:08:18,398 --> 00:08:19,239 I got needs. 197 00:08:19,315 --> 00:08:20,698 You got needs. 198 00:08:20,775 --> 00:08:22,951 All God's children got needs. 199 00:08:23,027 --> 00:08:25,078 He really would like to have his name used in vain, 200 00:08:25,154 --> 00:08:25,870 you know. 201 00:08:25,947 --> 00:08:27,172 Hey, take a hike will ya. 202 00:08:27,249 --> 00:08:29,415 I think that's what the lady wants you to do. 203 00:08:29,492 --> 00:08:30,375 And who are you? 204 00:08:30,451 --> 00:08:31,401 Jonathan Smith. 205 00:08:31,478 --> 00:08:32,927 I work for Miss Blackwell. 206 00:08:32,638 --> 00:08:34,221 I'm Mark Gordon, in case you're interested. 207 00:08:34,297 --> 00:08:35,472 I work for her too. 208 00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:37,173 Mark Gordon, my new hairdresser. 209 00:08:37,250 --> 00:08:38,441 Hi. 210 00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:39,476 Mr. Richie raves about you. 211 00:08:39,553 --> 00:08:40,894 TODD JEFFRIES: The hairdresser. 212 00:08:40,971 --> 00:08:42,428 Well, why don't you and Mr. Richie 213 00:08:42,505 --> 00:08:44,931 here go, uh, warm your curlers. 214 00:08:45,008 --> 00:08:47,267 Hey, enough with the hairdresser jokes, huh. 215 00:08:47,277 --> 00:08:48,601 What are you going to do about it? 216 00:08:48,678 --> 00:08:50,228 Hit me with your purse? 217 00:08:50,305 --> 00:08:51,187 All right, that's it. 218 00:08:51,264 --> 00:08:52,355 Uh, Mark. 219 00:08:52,432 --> 00:08:53,347 That's my job. 220 00:08:56,686 --> 00:08:57,927 Now when your feet touch the floor 221 00:08:58,004 --> 00:09:00,038 you use them to walk away, all right. 222 00:09:03,276 --> 00:09:06,127 Linda, you're going to hear from my agent about this guy. 223 00:09:12,752 --> 00:09:15,044 Men are such idiots. 224 00:09:15,121 --> 00:09:16,963 Thank you, Smith, but next time would 225 00:09:16,974 --> 00:09:18,506 you try and use a little more finesse 226 00:09:18,583 --> 00:09:19,924 and a little less macho. 227 00:09:20,001 --> 00:09:21,518 I have to work with that man. 228 00:09:21,595 --> 00:09:23,036 Yes, ma'am. 229 00:09:23,113 --> 00:09:24,796 I'm no more impressed with men brawling over me 230 00:09:24,273 --> 00:09:26,055 than I am with that jerk trying to paw me. 231 00:09:26,132 --> 00:09:27,599 I'll remember that Miss Blackwell. 232 00:09:27,675 --> 00:09:28,741 Thank you. 233 00:09:28,818 --> 00:09:30,318 Now Mark, would you curl me out? 234 00:09:30,395 --> 00:09:32,070 We'll have a little girl talk in my dressing room. 235 00:09:44,025 --> 00:09:45,158 Well don't just stand there. 236 00:09:45,234 --> 00:09:47,660 Come on in. 237 00:09:47,737 --> 00:09:49,370 So what do you think? 238 00:09:49,447 --> 00:09:50,830 About what? 239 00:09:50,907 --> 00:09:51,898 My hair, silly. 240 00:09:51,975 --> 00:09:55,209 Do you think I should cut it? 241 00:09:55,286 --> 00:09:58,171 Oh, I don't know. 242 00:09:58,247 --> 00:10:01,341 Maybe a little trim around the ears. 243 00:10:01,417 --> 00:10:03,009 Trim around the ears? 244 00:10:03,086 --> 00:10:05,678 Yeah, that's all I ever do with mine. 245 00:10:05,755 --> 00:10:07,180 Oh, trim around the ears. Very cute. 246 00:10:07,256 --> 00:10:08,964 Now come on, the truth, what do you think? 247 00:10:09,042 --> 00:10:11,893 Truth is I think you came down kind of hard on Jonathan. 248 00:10:11,969 --> 00:10:13,686 Jonathan Smith? 249 00:10:13,763 --> 00:10:15,188 Yeah, he was just trying to protect you. 250 00:10:15,264 --> 00:10:16,398 Oh, he's not. 251 00:10:16,474 --> 00:10:17,398 He's just trying to impress me. 252 00:10:17,475 --> 00:10:18,624 Come on. 253 00:10:18,701 --> 00:10:19,684 I've been around these muscle boys. 254 00:10:19,760 --> 00:10:20,610 All these men are alike. 255 00:10:20,687 --> 00:10:22,111 They're just all on the make. 256 00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:23,171 Come on. 257 00:10:23,247 --> 00:10:24,247 Not all men are like that. 258 00:10:24,324 --> 00:10:27,784 Well maybe you're not, but you know what I mean. 259 00:10:27,860 --> 00:10:31,204 Listen, Jonathan is not like that either. 260 00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:34,749 I'm sure he's a perfect angel. 261 00:10:34,826 --> 00:10:36,217 You know, you're right about that. 262 00:10:39,598 --> 00:10:41,381 Oh listen, I'm really sorry. 263 00:10:41,457 --> 00:10:44,926 I didn't mean to say anything to upset you. 264 00:10:45,002 --> 00:10:48,096 I guess I was really wrong about Jonathan. 265 00:10:48,172 --> 00:10:51,191 So how long have you two been together? 266 00:10:51,267 --> 00:10:52,809 Oh, we've been going around the country 267 00:10:52,885 --> 00:10:55,770 together for about a year and a half and-- 268 00:10:55,847 --> 00:10:57,046 hey wait a minute. 269 00:10:57,123 --> 00:10:59,482 What are you talking about here? 270 00:10:59,559 --> 00:11:00,692 Well, about you Jonathan. 271 00:11:00,768 --> 00:11:02,485 What about me and Jonathan? 272 00:11:02,562 --> 00:11:04,704 Hey, why are you getting so defensive, Mark? 273 00:11:04,781 --> 00:11:05,972 I mean, I don't care. 274 00:11:06,049 --> 00:11:07,374 I mean, live and let live, you know. 275 00:11:07,450 --> 00:11:09,784 Hey now, just, just hold it here one second, all right. 276 00:11:09,861 --> 00:11:11,077 [knock on door] 277 00:11:11,154 --> 00:11:12,845 JONATHAN SMITH: Excuse me, Miss Blackwell. 278 00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:14,747 I'm sorry to interrupt, but you're wanted on the set. 279 00:11:14,824 --> 00:11:15,707 Oh, yeah. 280 00:11:15,783 --> 00:11:16,749 I'll be right there. 281 00:11:16,826 --> 00:11:20,086 I'll see you after lunch, Mark. 282 00:11:20,097 --> 00:11:21,796 Jonathan, I just wanted to say I'm sorry I 283 00:11:21,873 --> 00:11:23,056 was so catty this morning. 284 00:11:23,133 --> 00:11:25,508 I think you and Mark will work out just fine. 285 00:11:25,585 --> 00:11:26,434 Thank you very much. 286 00:11:28,963 --> 00:11:31,472 Hey, looks like you two really hit it off, huh. 287 00:11:31,549 --> 00:11:32,390 I mean, that's it. 288 00:11:32,467 --> 00:11:33,850 I'm off this assignment. 289 00:11:33,926 --> 00:11:35,017 I mean, I can't handle this one. 290 00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:35,977 I'm out. I'm gone. 291 00:11:36,053 --> 00:11:36,861 I'm history. 292 00:11:36,938 --> 00:11:39,188 I mean, no way Jose. 293 00:11:39,265 --> 00:11:40,990 All right, if that's what you feel. 294 00:11:41,067 --> 00:11:43,401 Of course you'll sure be letting your buddy Sam down. 295 00:11:43,478 --> 00:11:45,211 What do you mean? 296 00:11:45,288 --> 00:11:46,779 Just like I told you, he's part of the assignment. 297 00:11:46,856 --> 00:11:48,448 Look Jonathan, you don't understand. 298 00:11:48,524 --> 00:11:49,949 It's not important that I understand. 299 00:11:50,026 --> 00:11:51,367 I didn't give the assignment. 300 00:11:51,444 --> 00:11:52,552 The boss did. 301 00:11:52,628 --> 00:11:54,912 If you want out of it, just tell him. 302 00:11:54,989 --> 00:11:56,297 See you in the commissary. 303 00:11:58,701 --> 00:12:00,126 OK. OK. 304 00:12:00,203 --> 00:12:01,261 But I don't like it. 305 00:12:04,975 --> 00:12:06,758 Hey, guys. 306 00:12:06,834 --> 00:12:07,842 Do you mind if I pull up a chair. 307 00:12:07,919 --> 00:12:11,012 Sure, come on. 308 00:12:11,088 --> 00:12:13,598 Beer and a couple of racks of pool tonight, right? 309 00:12:13,674 --> 00:12:15,224 You got it, pal. 310 00:12:15,301 --> 00:12:18,019 Hey, Jonathan, I hear you had a run in with that jerk 311 00:12:18,095 --> 00:12:19,854 Todd Jeffries this morning. 312 00:12:19,931 --> 00:12:21,463 Word travels fast, huh? 313 00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,523 Yeah well, I wouldn't worry about it. 314 00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:24,567 If that jerk tries anything with his agent 315 00:12:24,644 --> 00:12:27,153 I'll back you up all the way. 316 00:12:27,164 --> 00:12:28,488 He's lucky it was you instead of me 317 00:12:28,564 --> 00:12:29,947 because if that clown had tried anything 318 00:12:30,024 --> 00:12:31,240 with Linda with me around he'd be picking 319 00:12:31,317 --> 00:12:33,025 pavement out of his teeth. 320 00:12:33,103 --> 00:12:35,495 Oh, sounds like you really care about her, huh? 321 00:12:35,571 --> 00:12:36,746 Yeah. 322 00:12:36,823 --> 00:12:37,705 Yeah. 323 00:12:37,716 --> 00:12:39,081 I guess so. 324 00:12:39,158 --> 00:12:41,176 You ever told her so? 325 00:12:41,252 --> 00:12:43,127 What are you talking about? 326 00:12:43,204 --> 00:12:44,845 I mean, you're single, she's single, 327 00:12:44,923 --> 00:12:47,724 you both seem like nice people, so why don't you ask her out? 328 00:12:47,801 --> 00:12:50,009 Are you kidding me? 329 00:12:50,086 --> 00:12:51,886 Hey come on, she doesn't even know I'm alive. 330 00:12:51,963 --> 00:12:53,103 Yeah well, whose fault is that? 331 00:12:53,181 --> 00:12:54,096 SAM QUIGLEY: Come on, Mark. 332 00:12:54,173 --> 00:12:55,348 She's a movie star. 333 00:12:55,424 --> 00:12:56,941 I'm a cop. 334 00:12:56,485 --> 00:12:59,519 She's a person, maybe she's lonely. 335 00:12:59,595 --> 00:13:01,570 Are you kidding me, huh? 336 00:13:01,647 --> 00:13:03,731 Come on, she's one of the most beautiful women in the world. 337 00:13:03,742 --> 00:13:05,817 She's got leading men hitting on her all the time. 338 00:13:05,893 --> 00:13:06,959 Oh, I know. 339 00:13:07,036 --> 00:13:08,427 I met one of them this morning. 340 00:13:08,505 --> 00:13:10,029 If he's any example it's no wonder she doesn't 341 00:13:10,106 --> 00:13:11,697 have a high opinion of men. 342 00:13:11,774 --> 00:13:13,366 You know he's right, Sam. 343 00:13:13,443 --> 00:13:14,600 I mean, what's it going to hurt to ask her out? 344 00:13:14,677 --> 00:13:16,869 My pride when she laughs in my face. 345 00:13:16,946 --> 00:13:18,337 Hey, if she does that, she's not somebody 346 00:13:18,415 --> 00:13:20,340 you should take out in the first place. 347 00:13:20,416 --> 00:13:22,041 Yeah. 348 00:13:22,118 --> 00:13:24,293 Yeah, I know. 349 00:13:24,370 --> 00:13:26,879 Look if I thought I had half a chance why I'd-- 350 00:13:26,956 --> 00:13:30,091 hey, you know what, you know, you could check it out for me. 351 00:13:30,167 --> 00:13:31,384 I mean, really, you could. 352 00:13:31,460 --> 00:13:32,385 You could see if she, she wouldn't mind 353 00:13:32,461 --> 00:13:33,886 me asking her out, you know. 354 00:13:33,963 --> 00:13:34,846 I mean, come on. 355 00:13:34,922 --> 00:13:36,305 Women, women confide. 356 00:13:36,382 --> 00:13:38,099 They talk straight to the hairdressers all the time. 357 00:13:38,175 --> 00:13:39,441 All right, all right. 358 00:13:39,519 --> 00:13:40,168 I'll see what I can find out. 359 00:13:40,244 --> 00:13:41,236 That guy. That's good. 360 00:13:41,312 --> 00:13:42,019 Thanks. 361 00:13:42,096 --> 00:13:43,604 Thanks, Mark. 362 00:13:43,681 --> 00:13:45,106 Hey, guys I'll see you later. I gotta go to work. 363 00:13:45,182 --> 00:13:46,023 - Right. - All right. 364 00:13:46,100 --> 00:13:48,901 See you. 365 00:13:48,978 --> 00:13:52,497 Boy, he is really stuck on her. 366 00:13:52,574 --> 00:13:56,534 And the ball's in your court now, Cupid. 367 00:13:56,611 --> 00:13:57,418 Oh, boy. 368 00:14:05,536 --> 00:14:08,254 So Mark, what's all this stuff about Sam Quigley. 369 00:14:08,331 --> 00:14:10,089 He's a great guy, that's all. 370 00:14:10,166 --> 00:14:10,965 Great guy. 371 00:14:11,042 --> 00:14:11,924 Come on. 372 00:14:12,001 --> 00:14:13,050 No such thing. 373 00:14:13,127 --> 00:14:14,585 Oh, will you give me a break. 374 00:14:14,663 --> 00:14:17,146 You act like it's so tough being a beautiful woman. 375 00:14:17,223 --> 00:14:18,180 Well, it is tough. 376 00:14:18,257 --> 00:14:19,765 It's brutal sometimes. 377 00:14:19,842 --> 00:14:21,133 You know what's tough? 378 00:14:21,210 --> 00:14:22,143 I'll tell you what's tough, working 379 00:14:22,219 --> 00:14:23,936 in a coal pit, that's tough. 380 00:14:24,013 --> 00:14:25,605 I mean, your life's a bed of roses. 381 00:14:25,681 --> 00:14:27,231 All you got to do is just smile a little bit. 382 00:14:27,308 --> 00:14:29,567 Do a little goochie, goochie, say your lines, 383 00:14:29,644 --> 00:14:30,860 collect a million bucks. 384 00:14:30,937 --> 00:14:32,879 God I wish I were in your shoes. 385 00:14:32,955 --> 00:14:34,780 Well, God, I wish I was a man for just long enough to show-- 386 00:14:34,857 --> 00:14:36,666 [thunder crashing] 387 00:14:37,693 --> 00:14:38,959 What happened? 388 00:14:39,036 --> 00:14:40,119 Well, must have blown a fuse. 389 00:14:40,196 --> 00:14:42,955 Hey Jonathan, somebody hit the break-- 390 00:14:43,032 --> 00:14:44,340 MOVIE CREW: Somebody hit the breakers. 391 00:14:47,370 --> 00:14:48,419 OK boys, we're back on. 392 00:14:48,496 --> 00:14:49,345 Let's go. 393 00:14:57,213 --> 00:15:02,058 (GROANING) Come on Jonathan, let's get out of here. 394 00:15:02,134 --> 00:15:03,860 I'm no good at this Cupid stuff. 395 00:15:03,937 --> 00:15:07,864 Besides I can't take any more that-- 396 00:15:07,941 --> 00:15:10,983 what's wrong with my voi- my body. 397 00:15:11,060 --> 00:15:13,486 This isn't my body. 398 00:15:13,562 --> 00:15:14,621 Oh, my gosh. 399 00:15:14,697 --> 00:15:17,531 My body died. 400 00:15:17,608 --> 00:15:18,991 No, no it didn't. 401 00:15:19,068 --> 00:15:22,036 She just fainted. 402 00:15:22,113 --> 00:15:24,413 She? 403 00:15:24,490 --> 00:15:25,340 She. 404 00:15:36,853 --> 00:15:39,270 [music playing] 405 00:15:43,759 --> 00:15:44,776 I can't believe it. 406 00:15:44,852 --> 00:15:47,603 I'm in her body and she's in mine? 407 00:15:47,680 --> 00:15:49,605 That's the way it looks from here. 408 00:15:49,682 --> 00:15:53,109 Oh Jonathan, how could you do that? 409 00:15:53,185 --> 00:15:54,068 Whoa. 410 00:15:54,145 --> 00:15:55,277 Hey, you all right, buddy? 411 00:15:55,354 --> 00:15:56,779 I don't know, I felt like I was walking 412 00:15:56,856 --> 00:15:58,114 downhill for a minute there. 413 00:15:58,191 --> 00:15:59,323 Oh, it must be the heels. 414 00:15:59,400 --> 00:16:00,408 - What? - Your heels. 415 00:16:00,484 --> 00:16:01,334 You got heels. 416 00:16:04,363 --> 00:16:05,287 God. 417 00:16:05,364 --> 00:16:06,372 Oh, my God. 418 00:16:06,449 --> 00:16:08,708 How do they walk in these things? 419 00:16:08,784 --> 00:16:10,710 All right Jonathan, fun is fun. 420 00:16:10,786 --> 00:16:12,336 Put me back. 421 00:16:12,413 --> 00:16:13,295 Come on. 422 00:16:13,372 --> 00:16:14,304 What are you waiting for? 423 00:16:14,382 --> 00:16:16,298 Put me back before she wakes up. 424 00:16:16,375 --> 00:16:17,332 I can't do that. 425 00:16:17,410 --> 00:16:18,801 What do you mean you can't do that? 426 00:16:18,878 --> 00:16:20,594 You put me in here, now get me out. 427 00:16:20,671 --> 00:16:22,430 I didn't put you in there. 428 00:16:22,506 --> 00:16:23,639 You mean the boss? 429 00:16:23,716 --> 00:16:24,849 Yeah. 430 00:16:24,925 --> 00:16:26,017 You didn't say, I wish to Jonathan. 431 00:16:26,093 --> 00:16:28,477 You said, I wish to God. 432 00:16:28,554 --> 00:16:31,647 Well don't just stand there, tell him to do something. 433 00:16:31,724 --> 00:16:33,482 Well, I think he already did. 434 00:16:33,559 --> 00:16:34,826 Oh that's cute Jonathan. 435 00:16:34,902 --> 00:16:36,352 That's really cute. 436 00:16:36,428 --> 00:16:44,118 (GROANING) Oh, my goodness gracious. 437 00:16:44,195 --> 00:16:45,003 Oh. 438 00:16:48,532 --> 00:16:50,082 Oh. 439 00:16:50,159 --> 00:16:52,635 Oh. 440 00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:53,627 Great. 441 00:16:53,704 --> 00:16:54,603 That's just great. 442 00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:56,047 She's out again. 443 00:16:56,123 --> 00:16:57,532 I can't say I blame her. 444 00:16:57,608 --> 00:16:59,050 I'd probably faint too if I looked in the mirror 445 00:16:59,126 --> 00:17:01,927 and saw you staring back at me. 446 00:17:02,004 --> 00:17:03,496 One more word, Jonathan. 447 00:17:03,573 --> 00:17:05,306 I'm telling you, one more word and angel or no angel, 448 00:17:05,382 --> 00:17:06,182 it's five to the chops. 449 00:17:06,258 --> 00:17:07,183 [knock on door] 450 00:17:07,259 --> 00:17:08,142 I'll get it. 451 00:17:08,219 --> 00:17:10,019 What do you mean you'll get it? 452 00:17:10,096 --> 00:17:11,479 You can't let anyone in there with me looking like this. 453 00:17:11,555 --> 00:17:13,564 Oh, come on Mark, you've only been a woman for a few minutes 454 00:17:13,641 --> 00:17:15,316 and you're already worried about the way you look. 455 00:17:15,392 --> 00:17:17,735 You can't let anybody see me like this. 456 00:17:17,812 --> 00:17:20,362 Why? 457 00:17:20,439 --> 00:17:22,990 I've got bosoms. 458 00:17:23,067 --> 00:17:24,533 - Everything OK in here? - Yeah, sure. 459 00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:25,901 Everything's fine. 460 00:17:25,978 --> 00:17:26,619 Why shouldn't everything be fine? 461 00:17:26,695 --> 00:17:27,770 I don't know? 462 00:17:27,847 --> 00:17:29,538 I heard somebody scream. 463 00:17:29,615 --> 00:17:30,831 Yeah, that was her. 464 00:17:30,908 --> 00:17:31,791 Who? 465 00:17:31,867 --> 00:17:33,167 Her. 466 00:17:33,244 --> 00:17:35,419 Who her? 467 00:17:35,496 --> 00:17:37,046 Him her. 468 00:17:37,123 --> 00:17:38,014 Mark Gordon saw a mouse. 469 00:17:38,091 --> 00:17:39,265 That's all, just a little mouse. 470 00:17:39,342 --> 00:17:41,425 Oh, hairdressers. 471 00:17:41,502 --> 00:17:44,470 Listen you little twerp, cut the hairdresser stuff. 472 00:17:44,481 --> 00:17:45,721 I'm as much of a man as you are. 473 00:17:45,798 --> 00:17:46,889 Yes, ma'am. 474 00:17:46,966 --> 00:17:48,766 Whatever you say, Miss Blackwell. 475 00:17:48,843 --> 00:17:50,643 Uh, they, uh, want you on the set now, ma'am. 476 00:17:50,719 --> 00:17:52,853 Yeah well, tell them to hold their water till I get there, 477 00:17:52,930 --> 00:17:54,405 you know. - Yes, ma'am. 478 00:18:05,668 --> 00:18:06,575 Where's Linda? 479 00:18:06,652 --> 00:18:07,493 She OK? 480 00:18:07,570 --> 00:18:09,087 Uh, I don't know. 481 00:18:09,163 --> 00:18:10,854 What do you mean, I don't know? 482 00:18:10,932 --> 00:18:12,581 Well, I went over there after I heard the scream 483 00:18:12,658 --> 00:18:15,042 and she told me that her hairdresser had seen a mouse, 484 00:18:15,119 --> 00:18:18,045 and then she told me she was just as big a man as I was 485 00:18:18,122 --> 00:18:22,216 and for you to hold your water. 486 00:18:22,293 --> 00:18:24,969 Actresses. 487 00:18:25,045 --> 00:18:26,929 See Jonathan here really is an angel, 488 00:18:27,006 --> 00:18:30,266 and well, when you and I wished to God that we could 489 00:18:30,342 --> 00:18:32,017 trade places, well he heard us and now 490 00:18:32,094 --> 00:18:33,894 I'm stuck with your body. 491 00:18:33,971 --> 00:18:36,147 You're stuck with mine. 492 00:18:36,223 --> 00:18:36,897 Right. 493 00:18:36,974 --> 00:18:39,024 Right. 494 00:18:39,101 --> 00:18:40,609 He's taking this a lot better than I did. 495 00:18:40,686 --> 00:18:41,944 Yeah. 496 00:18:42,021 --> 00:18:43,687 Look, I wish I could tell you how 497 00:18:43,331 --> 00:18:45,614 long you have to be like this, but it's just not up to me. 498 00:18:45,691 --> 00:18:48,409 Right, I understand. 499 00:18:48,485 --> 00:18:50,086 You know I got to hand it to you, 500 00:18:50,163 --> 00:18:53,914 you really got a lot of guts taking it this calm. 501 00:18:53,991 --> 00:18:55,541 Right. 502 00:18:55,618 --> 00:18:57,793 Ahhh. 503 00:18:57,870 --> 00:18:59,795 What the hell is going on in there? 504 00:18:59,872 --> 00:19:01,013 Must be another mouse. 505 00:19:04,460 --> 00:19:06,927 Now listen Miss Blackwell, you gotta stop screaming. 506 00:19:06,938 --> 00:19:08,062 You understand? 507 00:19:10,692 --> 00:19:11,607 OK. 508 00:19:14,345 --> 00:19:15,311 Thank you. 509 00:19:15,387 --> 00:19:17,855 Ahhh. 510 00:19:17,866 --> 00:19:19,190 There it is again. 511 00:19:19,266 --> 00:19:21,159 What are they doing to that poor guy in there? 512 00:19:23,771 --> 00:19:26,113 Get your hand off my mouth. 513 00:19:26,190 --> 00:19:29,033 Get your hand off my mouth this instant. 514 00:19:29,109 --> 00:19:32,286 You promise to be a good girl and not scream anymore? 515 00:19:32,363 --> 00:19:33,162 Yes. 516 00:19:33,239 --> 00:19:34,663 Yes. 517 00:19:34,740 --> 00:19:35,590 OK. 518 00:19:40,496 --> 00:19:41,304 All right. 519 00:19:41,380 --> 00:19:42,279 All right. 520 00:19:42,356 --> 00:19:43,672 I want to see my lawyer. 521 00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:46,217 I wanna see my lawyer right now. 522 00:19:46,293 --> 00:19:49,854 I'm going to sue the two of you. 523 00:19:49,931 --> 00:19:51,847 I'm going to sue him too. 524 00:19:51,924 --> 00:19:55,109 I'm going to sue the church. 525 00:19:55,186 --> 00:19:56,769 Linda, what good is it going to do? 526 00:19:56,845 --> 00:19:58,312 I mean, nobody's going to believe you. 527 00:19:58,389 --> 00:19:59,939 For all the world you're Mark Gordon. 528 00:20:00,015 --> 00:20:01,482 I want my body back. 529 00:20:01,558 --> 00:20:04,443 I've worked very hard getting that body in shape. 530 00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:05,527 I want my body back. 531 00:20:05,604 --> 00:20:06,913 I want my body back. 532 00:20:06,989 --> 00:20:08,039 I want my body. 533 00:20:08,115 --> 00:20:09,073 I want my body. 534 00:20:09,149 --> 00:20:09,999 I want my body. 535 00:20:10,076 --> 00:20:11,116 Linda, listen to me. 536 00:20:11,127 --> 00:20:12,326 Listen to me. 537 00:20:12,403 --> 00:20:13,369 What? 538 00:20:13,446 --> 00:20:15,204 He's doing this for a reason. 539 00:20:15,281 --> 00:20:17,498 Well, he has a very sick sense of humor. 540 00:20:17,574 --> 00:20:19,333 That's what Jonah said when the whale swallowed him. 541 00:20:19,410 --> 00:20:22,544 I would rather be swallowed by a whale than turned into one. 542 00:20:22,621 --> 00:20:23,429 I'm going to kill her. 543 00:20:23,506 --> 00:20:24,380 She's a guy. 544 00:20:24,456 --> 00:20:26,006 She can take it. 545 00:20:26,083 --> 00:20:26,966 Now, come on. 546 00:20:27,042 --> 00:20:28,133 Stop it and listen to me. 547 00:20:28,210 --> 00:20:29,918 Now he's doing this so each of you 548 00:20:29,995 --> 00:20:31,145 will understand what it's like to live like the other one. 549 00:20:31,222 --> 00:20:33,180 Now the sooner you accept that and do it, 550 00:20:33,191 --> 00:20:35,057 the sooner he's going to put you back in your own bodies. 551 00:20:35,134 --> 00:20:36,691 Now, stop it. 552 00:20:36,769 --> 00:20:40,062 You mean that he has to go out there and do my lines. 553 00:20:40,139 --> 00:20:41,263 I'll be ruined. 554 00:20:41,341 --> 00:20:43,165 Linda, that is exactly what I mean. 555 00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:44,483 You're going to have to keep all of Mark's appointments, 556 00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:46,702 and Mark's going to have to keep all of yours. 557 00:20:46,779 --> 00:20:48,445 - Piece of cake. - What? 558 00:20:48,522 --> 00:20:49,372 You heard me. 559 00:20:49,448 --> 00:20:50,656 Piece of cake. 560 00:20:50,733 --> 00:20:51,657 [knock on door] 561 00:20:51,734 --> 00:20:53,334 Yeah, come in. 562 00:20:53,411 --> 00:20:56,453 I hate to bother you, but Mr. Campbell wondered if-- 563 00:20:56,530 --> 00:20:58,122 Yeah, if what? 564 00:20:58,198 --> 00:21:01,583 If, uh, you'd like to rehearse. 565 00:21:01,660 --> 00:21:03,752 We're ready. 566 00:21:03,829 --> 00:21:06,046 You bet I'm ready. 567 00:21:06,123 --> 00:21:07,465 I'll be right there. 568 00:21:10,461 --> 00:21:12,678 You keep my hands off of those. 569 00:21:12,755 --> 00:21:13,704 Shut up. 570 00:21:17,476 --> 00:21:18,442 Piece of cake. 571 00:21:25,809 --> 00:21:26,775 Well hi, babe. 572 00:21:26,852 --> 00:21:28,953 Glad you could make it. 573 00:21:29,030 --> 00:21:29,945 You talking to me? 574 00:21:29,956 --> 00:21:31,905 You bet I am. 575 00:21:31,982 --> 00:21:33,657 Get your arm off of me. 576 00:21:33,734 --> 00:21:34,808 Come on, babe. 577 00:21:34,885 --> 00:21:36,476 You know you love it. 578 00:21:36,554 --> 00:21:37,703 Get your hand off of me or I'll rip it out of the socket 579 00:21:37,780 --> 00:21:39,079 and beat your brains in with it. 580 00:21:39,156 --> 00:21:40,664 Got it. 581 00:21:40,741 --> 00:21:42,282 Ooo. 582 00:21:42,360 --> 00:21:46,304 There's no, no on your lips, but yes, yes, yes in your eyes. 583 00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:54,595 Oh, no. He's out cold. 584 00:21:54,671 --> 00:21:55,521 Get the doc down here. 585 00:21:55,598 --> 00:21:56,630 Linda, are you crazy? 586 00:21:56,607 --> 00:21:58,057 What did you do that for? 587 00:21:58,133 --> 00:21:59,208 Me? 588 00:21:59,285 --> 00:22:01,352 That bozo had his hands all over me. 589 00:22:01,428 --> 00:22:02,394 Oh, big deal. 590 00:22:02,471 --> 00:22:03,812 We got a scene to shoot here. 591 00:22:03,889 --> 00:22:05,089 What do you mean, big deal? 592 00:22:05,166 --> 00:22:06,357 I mean, so he had his hands on you. 593 00:22:06,433 --> 00:22:07,316 He's a man. 594 00:22:07,393 --> 00:22:08,317 You're a woman. 595 00:22:08,394 --> 00:22:09,568 I'm not just a woman. 596 00:22:09,645 --> 00:22:10,703 I'm a man. 597 00:22:15,359 --> 00:22:19,119 What I mean is, I'm a person, and I got as much rights 598 00:22:19,196 --> 00:22:20,746 as a man. 599 00:22:20,823 --> 00:22:22,039 I got a right to be touched when I want to be touched 600 00:22:22,116 --> 00:22:23,832 and by whom I want to be touched. 601 00:22:23,909 --> 00:22:26,502 And nobody, but nobody, is gonna tell me that I mean yes 602 00:22:26,578 --> 00:22:29,213 when I say no just because I got a pair 603 00:22:29,289 --> 00:22:31,715 of bosoms and they don't. 604 00:22:31,792 --> 00:22:33,726 I never knew how tough it was for you gals. 605 00:22:41,227 --> 00:22:42,693 Call me when he comes to. 606 00:22:47,599 --> 00:22:49,900 Maybe it'll be worth it just to see me do that. 607 00:22:49,977 --> 00:22:50,826 Bap. 608 00:22:57,901 --> 00:22:58,867 Yo. 609 00:22:58,711 --> 00:22:59,868 Hey, where's the can, you know? 610 00:22:59,945 --> 00:23:00,744 The what? 611 00:23:00,821 --> 00:23:01,703 The can. 612 00:23:01,780 --> 00:23:02,705 The toilet. 613 00:23:02,781 --> 00:23:04,289 Oh, excuse me, the restroom. 614 00:23:04,366 --> 00:23:05,290 Oh, yeah. 615 00:23:05,367 --> 00:23:06,425 Follow me. 616 00:23:09,329 --> 00:23:11,180 Must you walk like that? 617 00:23:11,257 --> 00:23:12,098 Like what? 618 00:23:12,174 --> 00:23:13,549 Like a gorilla. 619 00:23:13,625 --> 00:23:15,092 You need to take smaller steps. 620 00:23:15,169 --> 00:23:16,760 People are staring. 621 00:23:16,837 --> 00:23:18,429 Yeah, well maybe they're staring at you. 622 00:23:18,505 --> 00:23:20,389 You don't look so hot mincing around like that either. 623 00:23:20,466 --> 00:23:21,723 All all right, let's don't argue. 624 00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:23,434 Now, we're going to be like this for a while, 625 00:23:23,510 --> 00:23:24,768 so let's just make the most of it. 626 00:23:24,845 --> 00:23:25,727 - Right. - Ah. 627 00:23:25,804 --> 00:23:26,654 Here we are. 628 00:23:30,267 --> 00:23:33,327 [screams] 629 00:23:42,070 --> 00:23:42,995 I think I'll wait. 630 00:23:43,071 --> 00:23:43,921 Yes, me too. 631 00:23:55,426 --> 00:23:56,867 How's it going? 632 00:23:56,811 --> 00:23:58,610 Can I help you with something? 633 00:23:58,687 --> 00:24:00,137 Oh no, I just wanted to see how Mark was doing? 634 00:24:00,214 --> 00:24:01,129 Oh. 635 00:24:01,107 --> 00:24:02,398 Mark? 636 00:24:02,475 --> 00:24:03,348 I mean, Miss Blackwell. 637 00:24:03,425 --> 00:24:04,600 Oh. 638 00:24:04,676 --> 00:24:05,726 Well, just between the two of us, 639 00:24:05,802 --> 00:24:07,811 this must be one of her off days. 640 00:24:07,888 --> 00:24:10,981 She's moving like a truck driver. 641 00:24:11,058 --> 00:24:12,683 Come on. Come on. 642 00:24:12,759 --> 00:24:13,817 They got pictures in the loo that take less 643 00:24:13,894 --> 00:24:15,277 time to paint than my face. 644 00:24:15,354 --> 00:24:16,487 Miss Blackwell, you're the one that 645 00:24:16,563 --> 00:24:18,322 wants the fuller lips, not me. 646 00:24:18,398 --> 00:24:20,148 Fuller? 647 00:24:20,225 --> 00:24:22,993 They're full enough to blow up the Goodyear blimp right now. 648 00:24:23,070 --> 00:24:25,829 Suit yourself. 649 00:24:25,906 --> 00:24:27,664 Let's rehearse again, Linda. 650 00:24:27,741 --> 00:24:28,415 Yeah. 651 00:24:28,492 --> 00:24:29,708 Yeah. 652 00:24:29,719 --> 00:24:31,668 Look can't I play the scene barefoot? 653 00:24:31,679 --> 00:24:34,505 Who walks through the desert in high heels? 654 00:24:34,515 --> 00:24:35,422 Movie stars. 655 00:24:35,499 --> 00:24:36,974 Now let's try it again. 656 00:24:48,220 --> 00:24:50,646 See what I mean? 657 00:24:50,722 --> 00:24:52,189 You been hitting the sauce, honey? 658 00:24:52,266 --> 00:24:54,233 Ah, shut up. 659 00:24:54,309 --> 00:24:56,452 Whoa. 660 00:24:56,529 --> 00:24:57,528 Linda. Linda. 661 00:24:57,604 --> 00:24:59,238 You all right, honey? 662 00:24:59,314 --> 00:25:01,323 LINDA BLACKWELL: I told you to keep your hands off of me. 663 00:25:01,334 --> 00:25:02,366 [punching] 664 00:25:02,442 --> 00:25:03,909 TODD JEFFRIES: (GROANS) - Cut. 665 00:25:03,986 --> 00:25:04,660 Cut. 666 00:25:04,736 --> 00:25:06,245 Brad, get the doctor. 667 00:25:06,321 --> 00:25:07,955 Yes, sir. 668 00:25:08,031 --> 00:25:09,289 Hey, you have seen Mark have you? 669 00:25:09,366 --> 00:25:10,174 The hairdresser? 670 00:25:10,251 --> 00:25:11,208 Yeah, he took off. 671 00:25:11,285 --> 00:25:12,584 What do you mean he took off? 672 00:25:12,661 --> 00:25:14,253 Well, the guy's a little flaky if you ask me. 673 00:25:14,329 --> 00:25:15,904 He said as long as we already had 674 00:25:15,981 --> 00:25:17,422 one Linda Blackwell around he was going to knock off early 675 00:25:17,433 --> 00:25:18,682 and do some shopping. 676 00:25:18,759 --> 00:25:19,725 Let me tell you, he can get in real trouble 677 00:25:19,802 --> 00:25:21,009 with the boss for doing that. 678 00:25:21,086 --> 00:25:24,179 You're telling me. 679 00:25:24,256 --> 00:25:27,149 [music playing] 680 00:25:52,743 --> 00:25:54,251 May I help you? 681 00:25:54,328 --> 00:25:56,753 These are wonderful. 682 00:25:56,830 --> 00:25:57,987 When did you get these in? 683 00:25:57,765 --> 00:26:00,757 Oh, just yesterday. 684 00:26:00,834 --> 00:26:02,768 Oh, I love this. 685 00:26:08,175 --> 00:26:08,999 I don't know. 686 00:26:09,076 --> 00:26:11,268 I just don't think it's me. 687 00:26:11,345 --> 00:26:15,188 It's really difficult to tell with this beard, you know. 688 00:26:15,265 --> 00:26:18,942 Oh, I suppose not. 689 00:26:19,019 --> 00:26:22,279 Perhaps if you shaved it off? 690 00:26:22,356 --> 00:26:25,749 I would but I'm afraid that what's under it might be worse. 691 00:26:33,033 --> 00:26:34,883 Oh, boy. 692 00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:36,435 Uh, Linda. 693 00:26:36,511 --> 00:26:37,628 Jonathan, what do you think of this lipstick? 694 00:26:37,704 --> 00:26:39,129 Give me that will ya. 695 00:26:39,206 --> 00:26:40,739 What are you-- 696 00:26:40,816 --> 00:26:42,716 You know, I think you better start remembering who you are, 697 00:26:42,793 --> 00:26:44,134 or who you're supposed to be. 698 00:26:44,211 --> 00:26:45,886 Now what is that supposed to mean? 699 00:26:45,962 --> 00:26:48,096 It means that the reason the boss switched you two 700 00:26:48,173 --> 00:26:50,599 is so that each one of you could learn how the other one lives. 701 00:26:50,676 --> 00:26:52,267 Jonathan listen, it is bad enough 702 00:26:52,344 --> 00:26:54,478 that I have to walk around with this moss 703 00:26:54,554 --> 00:26:55,704 growing all over my back. 704 00:26:55,781 --> 00:26:57,197 What else am I supposed to do? 705 00:26:57,274 --> 00:26:58,815 Well, until the boss switches you back, 706 00:26:58,892 --> 00:27:00,901 you're supposed to be Mark Gordon not just look like him. 707 00:27:00,977 --> 00:27:02,578 Now, that means working at his job, 708 00:27:02,655 --> 00:27:04,321 socializing with his friends. 709 00:27:04,398 --> 00:27:06,490 Wait a minute, you mean I have to associate with a bunch 710 00:27:06,566 --> 00:27:08,825 of beer-belching over-the-hill jocks 711 00:27:08,902 --> 00:27:10,827 whose only interest in life is making 712 00:27:10,904 --> 00:27:12,245 snide remarks about women. 713 00:27:12,322 --> 00:27:13,130 Oh, please. 714 00:27:13,207 --> 00:27:14,514 Come on, now. 715 00:27:14,591 --> 00:27:15,733 You're being snide about his friends. 716 00:27:15,809 --> 00:27:17,501 Now don't judge people until you know them. 717 00:27:17,577 --> 00:27:19,135 Now, let's get out of here. 718 00:27:19,213 --> 00:27:20,671 I'm going to buy some shoes while I'm here. 719 00:27:20,747 --> 00:27:21,880 I don't think they're going to have 720 00:27:21,891 --> 00:27:23,382 what you're looking for in 12D. 721 00:27:23,458 --> 00:27:26,301 Oh, of course you're right. 722 00:27:26,378 --> 00:27:27,260 Goodbye. 723 00:27:27,337 --> 00:27:28,312 I'll be back. 724 00:27:28,389 --> 00:27:29,313 Stop doing that with your hand. 725 00:27:36,430 --> 00:27:38,271 What do you think you're doing? 726 00:27:38,348 --> 00:27:39,481 Hey, what the-- 727 00:27:39,558 --> 00:27:40,616 I'm having a little snack. 728 00:27:40,693 --> 00:27:42,367 A snack. 729 00:27:42,444 --> 00:27:45,320 I have seen lighter meals at feeding time at the zoo. 730 00:27:45,397 --> 00:27:46,488 But I-- 731 00:27:46,565 --> 00:27:48,699 You are not putting this in my body. 732 00:27:48,775 --> 00:27:50,158 I'm hungry. 733 00:27:50,235 --> 00:27:51,076 Jonathan. 734 00:27:51,153 --> 00:27:52,035 No. 735 00:27:52,112 --> 00:27:53,212 Absolutely not. 736 00:27:53,288 --> 00:27:57,582 If you need to pick me up, you drink this. 737 00:27:57,659 --> 00:27:59,209 What is this? 738 00:27:59,286 --> 00:28:00,761 Hot lemon juice. 739 00:28:00,838 --> 00:28:02,587 What about my pizza? 740 00:28:02,664 --> 00:28:04,423 No, no, no, no, no, no. 741 00:28:04,499 --> 00:28:05,716 Not your pizza. 742 00:28:05,726 --> 00:28:07,685 Mark Gordon's pizza. 743 00:28:07,761 --> 00:28:10,137 Linda Blackwell is on a diet. 744 00:28:10,213 --> 00:28:15,392 Just part of the price that we women have to pay. 745 00:28:15,403 --> 00:28:21,231 You know, it is really a shame to let this pizza go to waste. 746 00:28:21,308 --> 00:28:25,152 Oh, pizza, baby it has been so long. 747 00:28:25,228 --> 00:28:27,612 Come to mama. 748 00:28:27,689 --> 00:28:29,540 Mmm. 749 00:28:29,616 --> 00:28:31,450 So good. 750 00:28:31,526 --> 00:28:32,434 Yummy, yummy. 751 00:28:32,511 --> 00:28:33,919 Mmm, mmm. mmm. 752 00:28:41,728 --> 00:28:44,012 [music playing] 753 00:28:55,025 --> 00:28:57,267 See you on the set tomorrow, Linda. 754 00:28:57,344 --> 00:28:58,977 Goodnight, sweetheart. 755 00:28:59,054 --> 00:28:59,903 Goodnight, darling. 756 00:29:04,267 --> 00:29:05,233 You. 757 00:29:05,310 --> 00:29:06,902 Where do you think you're going? 758 00:29:06,978 --> 00:29:08,069 That's my car. 759 00:29:08,146 --> 00:29:09,312 Wrong. 760 00:29:09,389 --> 00:29:10,572 That's Linda Blackwell's car. 761 00:29:10,649 --> 00:29:13,241 Home, Miss Blackwell? 762 00:29:13,318 --> 00:29:14,676 Home, my foot. 763 00:29:14,753 --> 00:29:16,995 Take me to the nearest burger joint. 764 00:29:17,072 --> 00:29:20,373 You, she, this is not fair, Jonathan. 765 00:29:20,450 --> 00:29:21,458 This is not fair. 766 00:29:21,535 --> 00:29:22,501 Oh, come on. 767 00:29:22,577 --> 00:29:24,086 It's probably all for the best. 768 00:29:23,929 --> 00:29:25,420 Sam would have thought it was kind of funny if you 769 00:29:25,497 --> 00:29:26,922 drove up in a limo anyway. 770 00:29:26,998 --> 00:29:28,256 Sam who? 771 00:29:28,333 --> 00:29:29,391 Sam Quigley. 772 00:29:29,468 --> 00:29:30,592 Supposed to meet him tonight. 773 00:29:30,669 --> 00:29:31,593 Shoot a few racks of pool. 774 00:29:31,670 --> 00:29:32,677 Talk about old times. 775 00:29:32,754 --> 00:29:34,262 Oh, that sounds like an evening 776 00:29:34,339 --> 00:29:35,931 full of charm and glamour. 777 00:29:35,941 --> 00:29:37,441 Oh come on Linda, don't tell me 778 00:29:37,518 --> 00:29:39,184 you never wondered what the boys we're talking 779 00:29:39,261 --> 00:29:40,185 about in the locker room. 780 00:29:40,262 --> 00:29:41,353 Now's your chance. 781 00:29:41,429 --> 00:29:42,913 Marvelous. 782 00:29:42,989 --> 00:29:45,449 I can spend the entire evening discussing sweat socks. 783 00:29:45,526 --> 00:29:48,193 Honestly. 784 00:29:48,270 --> 00:29:50,612 I wish you wouldn't do that with your hand. 785 00:29:50,689 --> 00:29:53,791 [music playing] 786 00:30:06,329 --> 00:30:08,255 What would you like me to get you, Miss Blackwell? 787 00:30:08,331 --> 00:30:09,548 Oh, relax, I can get it. 788 00:30:09,624 --> 00:30:11,633 But, Miss Blackwell, this is a public place. 789 00:30:11,710 --> 00:30:13,010 No kidding. 790 00:30:13,086 --> 00:30:14,561 I didn't think it was a private club. 791 00:30:17,516 --> 00:30:18,473 What are you doing? 792 00:30:18,550 --> 00:30:20,976 Guarding you. 793 00:30:21,052 --> 00:30:22,143 Guarding me? 794 00:30:22,220 --> 00:30:23,728 Hey, pal, I'm a big boy. 795 00:30:23,805 --> 00:30:25,047 I can take care of myself. 796 00:30:25,123 --> 00:30:26,398 Why don't you just relax in the car, OK. 797 00:30:26,474 --> 00:30:27,658 I'll get us a couple of burgers. 798 00:30:49,497 --> 00:30:50,630 All right. 799 00:30:50,707 --> 00:30:52,341 Let me read this back to you. 800 00:30:52,017 --> 00:30:57,721 That's four cheeseburgers, four fries, two apple pies, two 801 00:30:57,797 --> 00:30:59,764 onion rings, and three tacos. 802 00:30:59,841 --> 00:31:01,149 Yeah and a shake. 803 00:31:01,226 --> 00:31:04,311 Vanilla, and you better give me a strawberry too. 804 00:31:04,387 --> 00:31:05,520 All right. 805 00:31:05,597 --> 00:31:07,856 That's just be a minute. 806 00:31:07,933 --> 00:31:10,191 I still don't believe that was Lucille Ball. 807 00:31:10,268 --> 00:31:11,776 Jake it was her. 808 00:31:11,787 --> 00:31:13,695 But she's so friendly on TV. 809 00:31:13,772 --> 00:31:16,197 I looked in the window, she closed the blinds. 810 00:31:16,274 --> 00:31:17,157 Nice, shmice. 811 00:31:17,233 --> 00:31:18,408 It was Lucy. 812 00:31:18,419 --> 00:31:19,784 Well, I better get a closer look 813 00:31:19,795 --> 00:31:22,412 at a biggie before this day-- 814 00:31:22,489 --> 00:31:25,591 Linda, Linda Blackwell. 815 00:31:33,458 --> 00:31:34,716 Come on. Come on. 816 00:31:34,727 --> 00:31:35,893 Let's get out of here. 817 00:32:00,485 --> 00:32:04,913 Oh, Sam, that is the funniest story I've ever heard. 818 00:32:04,990 --> 00:32:08,166 And these ribs are fantastic. 819 00:32:08,243 --> 00:32:12,087 You know Sam, I have to admit I cannot recall when I have 820 00:32:12,097 --> 00:32:15,256 had a nicer evening with a man. 821 00:32:15,333 --> 00:32:18,218 Been fun seeing you again too, but I, uh, 822 00:32:18,294 --> 00:32:20,011 you know I must say, you know, you've 823 00:32:20,088 --> 00:32:22,430 changed over the last 15 years. 824 00:32:22,507 --> 00:32:24,274 Last 15 hours is more like it. 825 00:32:27,220 --> 00:32:28,937 Know what I wish? 826 00:32:29,014 --> 00:32:32,315 I wish I could go out with Linda like this. 827 00:32:32,392 --> 00:32:33,341 Linda who? 828 00:32:33,418 --> 00:32:34,192 Linda who. 829 00:32:34,269 --> 00:32:35,843 Linda Blackwell. 830 00:32:35,921 --> 00:32:37,779 Weren't you listening in the commissary, huh? 831 00:32:37,856 --> 00:32:40,281 You were gonna see if I had a prayer, you know. 832 00:32:40,358 --> 00:32:42,325 Yeah, fat chance of that though, huh? 833 00:32:42,402 --> 00:32:43,618 Yeah. 834 00:32:43,695 --> 00:32:44,569 I don't know. 835 00:32:44,646 --> 00:32:46,287 She might like it. 836 00:32:46,364 --> 00:32:47,247 What makes you say that? 837 00:32:47,323 --> 00:32:48,131 Did you ask her? 838 00:32:48,208 --> 00:32:48,840 No, no. 839 00:32:48,917 --> 00:32:50,450 It's just a feeling. 840 00:32:50,527 --> 00:32:53,461 Oh well, I don't think you're right on this one. 841 00:32:53,538 --> 00:32:54,888 She's a movie star. 842 00:32:54,965 --> 00:32:56,198 Maybe your right. 843 00:32:56,141 --> 00:32:58,341 She's probably just stuck on herself. 844 00:32:58,418 --> 00:32:59,968 No, I don't think so. 845 00:33:00,045 --> 00:33:01,720 You know, it's probably just because she's afraid. 846 00:33:01,796 --> 00:33:03,138 People keep asking things of her, 847 00:33:03,214 --> 00:33:05,932 like an autograph, a introduction, maybe 848 00:33:06,009 --> 00:33:08,685 a little hit-and-run romance, you know. 849 00:33:08,762 --> 00:33:11,021 Isn't that what you want too? 850 00:33:11,097 --> 00:33:12,455 Me? 851 00:33:12,532 --> 00:33:13,982 Hey, I thought you knew me better than that, buddy. 852 00:33:14,059 --> 00:33:15,608 I just told you how I felt about her. 853 00:33:15,685 --> 00:33:18,361 Oh, come on Sam, fess up. 854 00:33:18,438 --> 00:33:20,697 I mean, that would be something to brag about to your friends, 855 00:33:20,774 --> 00:33:22,123 right. 856 00:33:22,201 --> 00:33:24,075 Having a little fling with a movie star. 857 00:33:24,152 --> 00:33:26,161 You really don't know me do you buddy? 858 00:33:26,171 --> 00:33:29,205 All I'd want is a chance to make her happy. 859 00:33:29,282 --> 00:33:32,500 It's not as easy you think being, being in the public eye. 860 00:33:32,577 --> 00:33:33,668 You know what I bet? 861 00:33:33,745 --> 00:33:35,420 I bet she'd just like to let her hair 862 00:33:35,497 --> 00:33:38,173 down, have some fun with a guy who really cares, you know. 863 00:33:38,183 --> 00:33:41,009 You know, I read somewhere where she likes camellias 864 00:33:41,086 --> 00:33:42,936 so I sent her some once. 865 00:33:43,013 --> 00:33:44,912 I didn't put my name on it and she, 866 00:33:44,990 --> 00:33:50,185 well I saw her with them later and she, she looked so happy. 867 00:33:50,195 --> 00:33:51,519 That was you? 868 00:33:51,596 --> 00:33:53,655 Huh? 869 00:33:53,732 --> 00:33:57,776 Sam, I must tell you that until tonight I never realized 870 00:33:57,852 --> 00:33:59,861 what a wonderful man you are. 871 00:33:59,938 --> 00:34:01,613 Huh, what? 872 00:34:01,690 --> 00:34:03,915 I understand this is, is very difficult for you 873 00:34:03,992 --> 00:34:07,535 to understand, but it is so frustrating 874 00:34:07,612 --> 00:34:09,370 to be a man right now. 875 00:34:09,447 --> 00:34:11,039 I don't know what you're talking about, Gord-o. 876 00:34:11,116 --> 00:34:12,499 Well of course you don't, silly. 877 00:34:12,575 --> 00:34:14,175 How could you? 878 00:34:14,253 --> 00:34:17,045 Well, I don't know how I could, but just forget I asked. 879 00:34:17,122 --> 00:34:19,672 Sam, Sam, Sam I want you to know. 880 00:34:19,749 --> 00:34:21,099 I want you to know because tonight 881 00:34:21,176 --> 00:34:24,010 has been so special for me. 882 00:34:24,087 --> 00:34:25,720 I don't think I want to know, Gord-o. 883 00:34:25,797 --> 00:34:31,184 Sam, I'm not who you think I am. 884 00:34:31,261 --> 00:34:34,187 Hey Mark, look, that is your business. 885 00:34:34,264 --> 00:34:39,692 So Sam, Sam tell Linda how you feel about her. 886 00:34:39,703 --> 00:34:41,069 Trust me. 887 00:34:41,146 --> 00:34:44,155 I'm not telling you this is Mark Gordon. 888 00:34:44,232 --> 00:34:46,449 I'm telling you this as a woman. 889 00:34:46,526 --> 00:34:47,367 Ahh. 890 00:34:47,443 --> 00:34:49,119 Oh, Sam. 891 00:34:49,129 --> 00:34:50,504 Sam. 892 00:34:50,580 --> 00:34:51,788 Sam. 893 00:34:51,865 --> 00:34:52,822 Oh, dear. 894 00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:54,249 Sam, Sam are you all right? 895 00:34:54,325 --> 00:34:55,708 Just take your hands off me. 896 00:34:55,785 --> 00:34:56,835 What? 897 00:34:56,911 --> 00:34:58,878 Just take your hands off me, OK. 898 00:34:58,955 --> 00:35:00,088 What are you talking about? 899 00:35:00,165 --> 00:35:01,664 Look, you're my pal. 900 00:35:01,742 --> 00:35:03,424 I'm not gonna tell anybody about our little conversation. 901 00:35:03,501 --> 00:35:05,302 It's just going to be our secret, all right. 902 00:35:05,378 --> 00:35:07,637 Sam, just promise me that you won't let your pride 903 00:35:07,714 --> 00:35:08,972 stand in the way and that you'll tell 904 00:35:09,048 --> 00:35:10,473 Linda how you feel about her. 905 00:35:10,550 --> 00:35:11,724 OK, I promise. 906 00:35:11,735 --> 00:35:12,684 You mean that? 907 00:35:12,760 --> 00:35:14,060 Of course I mean it. 908 00:35:14,137 --> 00:35:15,270 I'm going to tell her right now. - Now. 909 00:35:15,346 --> 00:35:16,279 Yeah, now. 910 00:35:16,356 --> 00:35:18,231 No, I don't want you to tell her now. 911 00:35:18,308 --> 00:35:19,524 I want you to stay here with me. 912 00:35:19,601 --> 00:35:20,933 Hey, ho, ho. 913 00:35:21,010 --> 00:35:22,035 Let's not get a little pushy, you know. 914 00:35:22,112 --> 00:35:26,364 Now, it's your life but live and let live, OK. 915 00:35:26,441 --> 00:35:27,282 See ya. 916 00:35:27,292 --> 00:35:29,284 Sam. 917 00:35:29,360 --> 00:35:32,295 Oh, Sam. 918 00:35:32,372 --> 00:35:34,455 Linda, you've got to get hold of yourself. 919 00:35:34,532 --> 00:35:37,667 All right, splash a little cold water on your face 920 00:35:37,744 --> 00:35:38,969 and pull yourself together. 921 00:35:47,712 --> 00:35:50,188 [screams] 922 00:35:55,553 --> 00:35:57,445 Stay out, you pervert. 923 00:36:03,519 --> 00:36:04,578 Jonathan. 924 00:36:11,653 --> 00:36:14,713 [music playing] 925 00:36:24,040 --> 00:36:26,341 Ah, come on. 926 00:36:26,351 --> 00:36:29,344 Come on. 927 00:36:29,420 --> 00:36:30,494 What are you doing, huh? 928 00:36:30,572 --> 00:36:31,229 You're kidding yourself. 929 00:36:33,341 --> 00:36:34,474 Do it. 930 00:36:34,550 --> 00:36:36,359 [doorbell] 931 00:36:38,096 --> 00:36:40,363 Coming, coming. 932 00:36:40,440 --> 00:36:41,489 Keep your pants on. 933 00:36:44,602 --> 00:36:45,652 Uh, Miss Blackwell-- 934 00:36:45,728 --> 00:36:46,945 Sam, old buddy. 935 00:36:47,021 --> 00:36:49,739 Man am I glad to see you. 936 00:36:49,816 --> 00:36:51,032 You are? 937 00:36:51,109 --> 00:36:52,450 Yeah, I've been going crazy in this joint. 938 00:36:52,527 --> 00:36:54,244 You know, I mean, at first I thought it'd be fun 939 00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:56,329 but she doesn't have a thing to eat here but watercress and hot 940 00:36:56,406 --> 00:36:57,288 lemon juice. 941 00:36:57,365 --> 00:36:57,997 She? 942 00:36:58,074 --> 00:36:59,374 Yeah, her. 943 00:36:59,450 --> 00:37:00,333 Me. 944 00:37:00,410 --> 00:37:01,860 Forget it. 945 00:37:01,936 --> 00:37:03,461 Hey, what do you say we go shoot a couple racks of pool 946 00:37:03,538 --> 00:37:05,088 and grab some ribs. 947 00:37:05,164 --> 00:37:06,506 Well, you, you'd like to do that? 948 00:37:06,582 --> 00:37:09,217 Yeah, sure I'd love to. 949 00:37:09,294 --> 00:37:11,010 I've been bored stiff just sitting around here. 950 00:37:11,087 --> 00:37:12,845 We can talk about old times. 951 00:37:12,922 --> 00:37:14,898 What, what old times? 952 00:37:14,975 --> 00:37:15,999 New times. 953 00:37:16,076 --> 00:37:17,425 We can talk about new times. 954 00:37:17,502 --> 00:37:19,769 Man, I can't believe how easy it is talking to you. 955 00:37:19,846 --> 00:37:20,945 I mean, you don't know. 956 00:37:21,022 --> 00:37:22,313 I was, I was so nervous before. 957 00:37:22,324 --> 00:37:24,156 I mean-- 958 00:37:24,234 --> 00:37:25,692 Hey, what's to be nervous, I mean, we both put on our pants 959 00:37:25,768 --> 00:37:27,327 one leg at a time, you know. 960 00:37:27,404 --> 00:37:28,987 Huh? 961 00:37:29,063 --> 00:37:30,530 Right. 962 00:37:30,606 --> 00:37:31,990 Yeah. 963 00:37:32,067 --> 00:37:33,074 Hey why don't you sit down and relax. 964 00:37:33,151 --> 00:37:34,534 Let me see if I can't put something 965 00:37:34,610 --> 00:37:37,704 on that's more comfortable and then we'll have some fun, huh. 966 00:37:37,780 --> 00:37:39,831 Huh. 967 00:37:39,841 --> 00:37:41,291 Yeah, sure. Right. 968 00:37:41,367 --> 00:37:42,000 Woo hoo. 969 00:37:42,076 --> 00:37:45,720 I can't believe it. 970 00:37:45,797 --> 00:37:48,798 What a great girl. 971 00:37:48,875 --> 00:37:50,684 A little wacky, but great. 972 00:38:06,642 --> 00:38:08,443 This has been, without a doubt, 973 00:38:08,519 --> 00:38:11,362 the single most embarrassing humiliating 974 00:38:11,439 --> 00:38:13,197 night of my entire life. 975 00:38:13,208 --> 00:38:14,582 Linda will you calm down? 976 00:38:14,659 --> 00:38:15,517 Calm down. 977 00:38:15,593 --> 00:38:16,701 That's easy for you to say. 978 00:38:16,712 --> 00:38:17,860 Oh, no. 979 00:38:17,938 --> 00:38:19,495 I know I'm going to have a black eye. 980 00:38:19,572 --> 00:38:21,038 I know it. 981 00:38:21,116 --> 00:38:22,790 Thank goodness this is not my face. 982 00:38:22,867 --> 00:38:24,917 Linda, all I can tell you is that everything 983 00:38:24,994 --> 00:38:26,210 is just part of a plan. 984 00:38:26,287 --> 00:38:29,213 Well, the plan stinks. 985 00:38:29,290 --> 00:38:31,641 I finally meet a man that I could care about 986 00:38:31,718 --> 00:38:34,052 and he thinks I'm a raving lunatic. 987 00:38:34,128 --> 00:38:35,570 Oh now, wait a minute. 988 00:38:35,647 --> 00:38:36,429 He doesn't think you're a raving lunatic. 989 00:38:36,506 --> 00:38:37,847 He thinks Mark is. 990 00:38:37,924 --> 00:38:39,265 I have been humiliated. 991 00:38:39,342 --> 00:38:42,485 I have been assaulted by some hairy baboon, punched 992 00:38:42,562 --> 00:38:45,396 in the eye, tossed out on the street on my keister, 993 00:38:45,473 --> 00:38:48,107 and now the man that I think I'm in love with 994 00:38:48,184 --> 00:38:50,318 is on his way to pour out his heart 995 00:38:50,395 --> 00:38:53,237 to Mark Gordon, who by now has probably 996 00:38:53,248 --> 00:38:57,533 caused me to gain 15 pounds. 997 00:38:57,544 --> 00:39:00,036 Now look, why don't you just take it easy, 998 00:39:00,113 --> 00:39:02,997 you get undressed, you get some sleep 999 00:39:03,074 --> 00:39:06,292 everything's going to look a lot better to you in the morning. 1000 00:39:06,369 --> 00:39:08,044 Undress. 1001 00:39:08,121 --> 00:39:10,029 And you call yourself an angel. 1002 00:39:10,106 --> 00:39:14,133 Oh come on now, put on some pajamas and get some sleep. 1003 00:39:14,210 --> 00:39:16,010 Turn around. 1004 00:39:16,087 --> 00:39:17,261 Why? 1005 00:39:17,338 --> 00:39:18,596 Why? 1006 00:39:18,673 --> 00:39:21,307 Because I'm going to undress, that's why. 1007 00:39:21,384 --> 00:39:23,142 Oh come on, Linda. 1008 00:39:23,219 --> 00:39:24,510 I mean, first of all, I'm an angel. 1009 00:39:24,587 --> 00:39:26,946 Secondly, right now you're a guy. 1010 00:39:29,767 --> 00:39:31,567 Why do you keep bringing that up? 1011 00:39:31,578 --> 00:39:33,486 I'll change in the powder room. 1012 00:39:33,563 --> 00:39:34,412 Oh. 1013 00:39:38,910 --> 00:39:40,034 Oh. 1014 00:39:42,572 --> 00:39:44,914 Were you the last one to use this? 1015 00:39:44,991 --> 00:39:46,382 No angels don't have to. 1016 00:39:46,459 --> 00:39:48,042 Well, the next time you see Mr. Gordon would you 1017 00:39:48,119 --> 00:39:52,171 mind telling him that when he's finished to put the seat down? 1018 00:39:52,248 --> 00:39:53,473 Men. 1019 00:39:53,550 --> 00:39:56,134 Well, this is as comfortable as I could find. 1020 00:39:56,210 --> 00:39:57,810 Boy, do I feel better. 1021 00:39:57,887 --> 00:40:00,847 It's hard to believe what women go through to look good. 1022 00:40:00,923 --> 00:40:02,306 I think you look great. 1023 00:40:02,383 --> 00:40:04,008 You know, I got to be honest with you, 1024 00:40:04,085 --> 00:40:06,436 I was always was afraid to, to approach you, you know. 1025 00:40:06,512 --> 00:40:08,938 Kind of like, like you were queen. 1026 00:40:08,949 --> 00:40:09,856 I know I was wrong. 1027 00:40:09,932 --> 00:40:11,441 I misjudged you. 1028 00:40:11,517 --> 00:40:12,942 I mean, you're the, you're one of the most down-to-earth women 1029 00:40:13,019 --> 00:40:13,985 I've ever met. 1030 00:40:14,061 --> 00:40:15,178 Thanks. 1031 00:40:15,255 --> 00:40:16,195 Come on, let's go get those beers. 1032 00:40:16,272 --> 00:40:18,239 Wait. 1033 00:40:18,316 --> 00:40:19,323 Wait. 1034 00:40:19,400 --> 00:40:20,700 Oh, what wait. 1035 00:40:20,776 --> 00:40:23,035 I have waited so long to be with you like this. 1036 00:40:23,112 --> 00:40:24,871 - What do you mean like this? - You know what I mean. 1037 00:40:24,947 --> 00:40:26,497 Look, I gotta tell you how I feel about you, 1038 00:40:26,574 --> 00:40:27,707 even if you laugh in my face. 1039 00:40:27,783 --> 00:40:28,416 Oh no. 1040 00:40:28,493 --> 00:40:29,909 No, no, no. 1041 00:40:29,986 --> 00:40:31,510 I'm not laughing see, but this isn't the right time 1042 00:40:31,588 --> 00:40:32,946 and I'm nothing like what you think I'm like. 1043 00:40:33,022 --> 00:40:34,672 I think is the most wonderful woman in the world. 1044 00:40:34,749 --> 00:40:35,923 Yeah, well see, see. Right there. 1045 00:40:36,000 --> 00:40:37,467 See, that's a mistake right there, see. 1046 00:40:37,543 --> 00:40:38,885 - I love you. - No, you don't. 1047 00:40:38,961 --> 00:40:39,844 Yes, I do. 1048 00:40:39,921 --> 00:40:40,854 No, you don't. 1049 00:40:44,175 --> 00:40:45,057 Linda, I'm sorry. 1050 00:40:45,134 --> 00:40:46,392 Just let me up, please. 1051 00:40:46,469 --> 00:40:47,935 Not until you let me explain. 1052 00:40:48,012 --> 00:40:49,295 You don't have to explain. 1053 00:40:49,239 --> 00:40:50,980 I just made a complete fool out of myself. 1054 00:40:51,057 --> 00:40:52,857 You don't understand, Sam. 1055 00:40:52,868 --> 00:40:53,983 Yeah, I do understand. 1056 00:40:53,994 --> 00:40:56,194 Linda, you're hurting my neck. 1057 00:40:56,270 --> 00:40:57,996 Sam, listen. 1058 00:40:58,072 --> 00:40:59,572 Listen. It's OK. 1059 00:40:59,649 --> 00:41:00,531 What an idiot I was. 1060 00:41:00,542 --> 00:41:02,074 No, you weren't. 1061 00:41:02,151 --> 00:41:03,409 You weren't an idiot. 1062 00:41:03,486 --> 00:41:05,495 Listen, your timing is just off, that's all. 1063 00:41:05,505 --> 00:41:06,704 You think you love me but you don't. 1064 00:41:06,781 --> 00:41:08,756 The one you really love is Mark. 1065 00:41:08,833 --> 00:41:09,749 What? 1066 00:41:09,759 --> 00:41:10,958 Mark. 1067 00:41:11,035 --> 00:41:12,510 Look, I know it sounds confusing and it is. 1068 00:41:12,587 --> 00:41:16,014 Oh God, I wish I'd never asked to be in her shoes. 1069 00:41:16,090 --> 00:41:18,933 [thunder crashing] 1070 00:41:20,795 --> 00:41:25,765 Jonathan, what if he chooses to leave us like this? 1071 00:41:25,841 --> 00:41:27,266 I don't think I can take it. 1072 00:41:27,343 --> 00:41:30,019 I just, I think I'm having a nervous breakdown. 1073 00:41:30,030 --> 00:41:32,563 God, I am sorry I ever asked to be a man. 1074 00:41:32,640 --> 00:41:34,032 [thunder crashing] 1075 00:41:34,108 --> 00:41:34,982 What is that? 1076 00:41:35,059 --> 00:41:36,234 Why is that doing that? 1077 00:41:36,244 --> 00:41:40,413 Jonathan, Jonathan what, what is this? 1078 00:41:40,490 --> 00:41:42,907 Oh, it is the blackout. 1079 00:41:42,984 --> 00:41:43,908 Jonathan. 1080 00:41:43,919 --> 00:41:45,868 [thunder crashing] 1081 00:41:45,945 --> 00:41:48,796 [screaming] 1082 00:41:56,056 --> 00:41:56,963 Mark? 1083 00:41:57,039 --> 00:41:58,130 I'm back. 1084 00:41:58,207 --> 00:41:59,140 The boss put me back. 1085 00:42:08,634 --> 00:42:11,069 [thunder crashing] 1086 00:42:11,145 --> 00:42:13,655 [screaming] 1087 00:42:19,020 --> 00:42:19,860 Linda. 1088 00:42:19,937 --> 00:42:21,428 Oh, Sam. 1089 00:42:21,506 --> 00:42:24,282 Li-, Linda, I can't tell you how sorry I am about-- 1090 00:42:24,358 --> 00:42:25,792 I got my body back. 1091 00:42:28,788 --> 00:42:31,163 OK, I promise you one thing, you'll 1092 00:42:31,240 --> 00:42:32,498 never be bothered by me again. 1093 00:42:32,575 --> 00:42:33,833 Where are you going? 1094 00:42:33,909 --> 00:42:35,126 Going back to where I belong. 1095 00:42:35,202 --> 00:42:36,002 No, please. 1096 00:42:36,078 --> 00:42:37,545 Oh, Sam don't go. 1097 00:42:37,622 --> 00:42:40,673 Look, uh, I know I acted rather oddly tonight 1098 00:42:40,750 --> 00:42:42,842 but I really wasn't myself. 1099 00:42:42,918 --> 00:42:44,051 But I am now. 1100 00:42:46,714 --> 00:42:50,099 I really don't want you to go. 1101 00:42:50,110 --> 00:42:52,518 You mean that? 1102 00:42:52,595 --> 00:42:54,186 Yes, I do. 1103 00:42:54,263 --> 00:42:56,939 More than you know. 1104 00:42:57,016 --> 00:42:58,858 I love you. 1105 00:42:58,934 --> 00:43:02,486 Oh, don't say that unless you mean it because I 1106 00:43:02,563 --> 00:43:04,530 love you too much for that. 1107 00:43:04,607 --> 00:43:14,582 So do I. 1108 00:43:14,659 --> 00:43:21,714 So do I. 1109 00:43:21,791 --> 00:43:23,799 LINDA BLACKWELL: Wait, I forgot the bouquet. 1110 00:43:23,876 --> 00:43:26,185 OK girls, back here by the door. 1111 00:43:29,590 --> 00:43:31,557 Well buddy, your dream came true. 1112 00:43:31,634 --> 00:43:33,643 It sure did. 1113 00:43:33,719 --> 00:43:34,852 Thanks for helping. 1114 00:43:34,929 --> 00:43:37,813 Hey, what are friends for, huh? 1115 00:43:37,890 --> 00:43:41,025 Yeah, Mark, I'm a married man now. 1116 00:43:41,102 --> 00:43:42,910 Come on Sam, you don't understand. 1117 00:43:42,987 --> 00:43:44,128 I know. 1118 00:43:44,205 --> 00:43:45,913 I know but we can still be friends. 1119 00:43:48,025 --> 00:43:48,875 Thanks. 1120 00:43:56,926 --> 00:43:58,417 I don't know how to thank you. 1121 00:43:58,494 --> 00:44:00,178 Hey, I didn't do anything. 1122 00:44:00,254 --> 00:44:02,338 Well, maybe you can thank the boss for me. 1123 00:44:02,415 --> 00:44:03,555 Why don't you do that yourself. 1124 00:44:03,633 --> 00:44:05,174 His number is not unlisted. 1125 00:44:05,251 --> 00:44:08,094 I will. 1126 00:44:08,170 --> 00:44:10,763 All right, here we go. 1127 00:44:10,840 --> 00:44:17,061 Uh, hey well, good luck. 1128 00:44:17,138 --> 00:44:19,230 I don't know how you live with this fur. 1129 00:44:19,306 --> 00:44:22,090 I don't know how you live with those heels. 1130 00:44:25,604 --> 00:44:26,570 Good luck. 1131 00:44:26,647 --> 00:44:27,664 See you. 1132 00:44:56,385 --> 00:44:59,019 I guess you learned a little something from all this, huh. 1133 00:44:59,030 --> 00:45:01,355 You bet I did. 1134 00:45:01,432 --> 00:45:03,649 You know people have got a tough. 1135 00:45:03,660 --> 00:45:05,109 I don't mean just men. 1136 00:45:05,186 --> 00:45:06,119 I don't mean just women. 1137 00:45:06,195 --> 00:45:07,620 I mean people. 1138 00:45:07,697 --> 00:45:09,196 Well, I don't know about that. 1139 00:45:09,273 --> 00:45:11,115 What do you mean you don't know about that? 1140 00:45:11,126 --> 00:45:13,743 Look how complicated their relationships are. 1141 00:45:13,819 --> 00:45:17,121 Everybody's got all these fears and hangups. 1142 00:45:17,198 --> 00:45:22,501 Hey, Jonathan, look at that bull out in the pasture. 1143 00:45:22,512 --> 00:45:24,253 Now you think he's got any hangups? 1144 00:45:24,330 --> 00:45:26,756 You think he worries about being too macho 1145 00:45:26,766 --> 00:45:29,175 or about success or money. 1146 00:45:29,251 --> 00:45:31,260 No sirree, Bob. 1147 00:45:31,337 --> 00:45:32,428 He has got it made. 1148 00:45:32,505 --> 00:45:35,181 I mean, all the grass he can eat. 1149 00:45:35,191 --> 00:45:37,650 Let me tell you, that's what I call living. 1150 00:45:37,727 --> 00:45:39,435 [thunder crashing] 1151 00:45:39,512 --> 00:45:40,352 Oh, no. 1152 00:45:40,429 --> 00:45:41,353 Wait a minute. 1153 00:45:41,430 --> 00:45:43,022 That, that's not what I meant. 1154 00:45:43,098 --> 00:45:44,031 Jonathan. 1155 00:45:44,108 --> 00:45:45,566 Jonathan do something, will ya. 1156 00:45:45,643 --> 00:45:49,653 [mooo] Jonathan. 1157 00:45:49,664 --> 00:45:52,531 Jonathan, wait. 1158 00:45:52,608 --> 00:45:53,991 Jonathan, wait. 1159 00:45:54,068 --> 00:45:55,117 My car. 1160 00:45:55,194 --> 00:45:56,660 Jonathan, don't let him wreck my car. 1161 00:45:56,737 --> 00:45:58,713 [music playing] 1162 00:46:10,793 --> 00:46:14,228 [theme music]